OU Week Facts of Dubious Veracity

If you are like me your hate-o-meters are probably pretty full already, but I am all about throwing babies fuel onto the fire.

1. OU QB Sam Bradford actually has a sidewinder missile for a penis and has your girlfriend's number on speed dial.
2. Bob Stoops is actually a Nigerian lord who needs you to send him your bank information so that he can transfer you his last $6.1 million.
3. Running back DeMarco Murray once ate your last chicken nugget that you were saving until you were all done with your fries. Fuck you DeMarco.
4. Bob Stoops gets really emotional when he's drunk, insisting on crying to everyone and telling them how "everyone think he's a slut just because he hooked up with that one shady frat guy."
5. Oklahoma is harboring Osama bin Laden and refuses to cooperate with the UN. Then again, who does?
6. Sam Bradford has no problem attempting to make conversation whilst making use of a urinal near you. He's also been known to glance over the partition, stating that he "just wanted to check out the competition."
7. DeMarco Murray always makes popcorn in the office kitchen and always burns the shit out of it.
8. Bob Stoops's 401k is doing just fine, "no thanks to That One" he told me.
9. Sam Bradford always groans and grunts as loudly as possible to show everyone else at Bally Total Fitness how awesome he looks in his sleeveless Under Armor jumpsuit. He, like, totally needs his mini water keg to stay hydrated, bro.
10. It's 6:15.