Colorado Week Facts of Dubious Veracity

Holy crap, is it really time to start playing (kind of) good teams now?! Some have said that this could very well be a trap game for Colt and family, so I have decided to nip this the bud and throw out some reasons to hate want to beat CU.

1. Josh Smith once said he though "Reggie Bush deserved the Heisman." Kind of like Reggie deserved his weekly pay check at USC (cha-zing).
2. Ralphie is widely known to attend the tailgates of strangers, drink tons of beer, eat all the food, hit on the host's girlfriend, and then not even offer any money or beer in return (and we all know your girlfriend is worth every penny).
3. Cody Hawkins's middle name is "hanger abortion" (over the line? It's the internet, what line?).
4. CU's mama is so fat she looks like Darrell Scott (Whopa! Immature and topical!).
5. Feminine hygiene commercials during football games was totally Dan Hawkins's idea.
6. CU and Georgia Tech won a national championship in 1990.
7. Darian Hagan finds Sarah Palin smart and Joe Biden warm (Debatable!).
8. Dan Hawkins, like, got totally blazed after lighting up your last bowl of the kindest bud you ever had the opportunity to experience (man).
9. Ralphie has no problem jumping to the front of long lines during rush hour by zooming up the lane that everyone knows merges. I could F-ing kill that buffalo.
10. Darrell Scott once privately committed to Texas, only to renege with the graciousness of your average Buffalo amidst a flurry of rumors that his mother may have been offered incentives from the Buffs. To make matters worse, Scott ended up spurning Texas coaches Major Applewhite and Bobby Kennedy, as well as visibly upsetting the otherwise unshakable Mack Brown in the process (reality burn).